Chirstmas Music (FREE! Lecture)

I don't remember exactly how it goes. Something about getting out of the oven and into the fireplace?

So, not complaining, but it seems that I get one major project done and have to jump to another one pronto.

Anyway, if you are in the Bay Area and would like to see and hear what has kept me away from blogging on a regular basis:

Tuesday, Dec. 7, 7pm at The National Shrine of St. Francis of Assisi in North Beach, San Francisco, Alta California, I will be giving a FREE! lecture on the Sounds of Christmas. Liturgical music will be outside of the bounds of my talk (keeping to folk material and perhaps a little bit of baroque, if I can't resist mixing Latin and German), but otherwise it will be excruciatingly traditional. No "Rudolph the Tippling Reindeer" here!

You know how you go into a play and there are a million warnings:

"During this production members of the cast will smoke cigarettes.

There will be a loud bang in Act III that might startle you..."

All of the things to make drama safe for those who should not venture outside their bubbles.

Anyway, the warning on my lecture will have to be:

"During this lecture, musical examples from Southern Italy will be played that might make you yearn for the soothing lyricism of Anton Webern."

Of course, these examples will feature an instrument that is traditionally associated with Christmas. It is one of my favorite instruments (hint: no, it's not the harpsichord, although that is also one of my favorite instruments). Can you guess which instrument this is?

One way or another, you ought to show up to learn a little more about the music of Christmas!

Oh yeah, did I mention that it is FREE!?

Anti-Thanksgiving Menu

The point of the anti-Thanksgiving menu is not to deny the need to give thanks for the good things we have. Instead, it is intended to give thanks without celebrating the Puritan arrival on the Continent. Practically, it amounts to an Italianate New World thanksgiving: by feasting and paying particular attention to the goodness of our food, we honor God Who, when he had created the world saw that it was good. It is to honor Christ, God made flesh, Who gives Himself to us in the Eucharist. As a result, particular honor must be made to bread and to wine.

To start with, how about an autumn salad of chicory, red lettuce, sliced persimmon, shaved pecorino romano, pomegranite seeds and toasted pumpkin seeds, all dressed in a balsamic vinaigrette?

Then, for a primo piatto, a pumpkin risotto (a basic risotto with pancetta, onion, carrotts, celery, then finished with chunks of roasted pumpkin, reggiano parmiggiano, and butter).

For a main course, one could go for young goose with a subcutaneous stuffing of goose innards, pancetta, fennel seed, garlic and rosemary (with a bit of fresh fennel, garlic and rosemary in the bird's cavity), or, if one is afraid of cooking goose, how about arista, a slow cooked loin of pork, stuffed with pancetta, garlic and rosemary.

On the side, with either dish, try fennel braised in milk, or roasted root vegetables.

For dessert, a panna cotta, with calvados persimmon sauce, accompanied by a vin santo.

For wine, start with a Puligny Montrachet to go with the salad, then a good Tuscan red to accompany the risotto and meat.

For a digestive, grappa or nocino would be perfect.

Turkey Hunt

Go hunting!

Take The Stinkin' Things Away!

I normally love cookies. All sorts of cookies: oatmeal chocolate chip, gingerbread, biscotti, ossi, Danish butter cookies, I mean all sorts of cookies. Yum. So I naturally look forward to the annual newspaper cookie recipe contest. Readers submit their recipes and the students of the restaurant program at a local community college bake them and then the food writers, food editors, and food photographers get together for a day of cookie tasting.

It is a fun event. For one thing, this is the one day that I get to hang out with all the food department. I work out of my home and NEVER have to go to the office for meetings or whatnot. They call, I eat, write and email, and they send a check. A weekly phone call with my editor is about all the contact I have with the department. However, food writers are fun, so it is a blast to hang out with them and nitpick on cookies.

Amalia gets to go to these, too, and having a three year old at a cookie judging is fun. She picks the cookies that have faces on them, the cookies that are bright pink and eats with gusto. She has the advantage over us. When she has had her fill (and then some, as toddlers are not known for regulating their cookie consumption, and that cookie regulating fascist father of hers is busy tasting and does not always say, "Amalia, don't you think that two merengue balls is enough?") she can run around the kitchen identifying the equipment and pointing out things that the rest of us fail to notice (or at least fail to comment on). The professional Wolf range, for instance, has blue fire! Pretty nifty.

So, while Amalia gets to take a respite from cookie consumption, we professionals have to keep tasting away. It takes about two bites to fairly judge a cookie, but there were 82 entries. We broke the entries into groups and teamed up, which brought it down to 20 cookies for round one, and then 10 for the final round. Needless to say, the 50 (some cookies, well, at first bite you really don't need to give them a second try to know that they are out of the running) bites of cookies add up to a lot of sweet dough sloshing around in the gut. Next year we need to bring more tasters.

Needless to say, I will probably not be craving a cookie any time soon!

Anyway, if you are going to enter a cookie contest remember that the judges will have been gnawing on an awful lot of cookies. That sweetness just builds and builds, so if you have a less sweet cookie, you will stand a much better chance of winning.

Also, adult tastes are a welcome relief from the gobs of chocolate (not to mention candies - although a few cookies with M and M's did make the final cut) that the judges will be tasting. If you are going to enter a chocolate cookie you will win points by: 1. Using dark chocolate and 2. Adding some other subtle flavor to the mix (subtle, mind you. Chocolate is a powerful blast of flavor. It does not need even stronger flavors to confuse things).

Another thing to keep in mind is that judges who have been eating too much like lighter textures. That super dense shortbread with frosting might be the perfect thing on a cold winter night, but when it is entry number 78 it probably will lose some of its charm. We are professionals, but we are also human and have human bodies. We can imagine eating a cookie in the correct setting, but the fact remains that we will have to actually eat and savor the cookie in the setting of the judging, so if you are intent on winning, keep that in mind.

The other thing to remember is that you might make your fantastic holiday cookies with candied citrus that you made yourself to exacting specifications, Remy Martin XO, Organic Unsalted Cultured Butter and Madagascar Bourbon Vanilla, but the chances are that the semi-commercial kitchen will use what they have, so it will be store bought candied orange peels, Christian Brothers brandy, cheap sweat cream butter (or shortening, if that is what the budget allows), and possibly vanillin. Our kitchen did a great job, but there were a few recipes that they had to use some substitutions in. They want their craftsmanship to shine, so they will do their best, but don't expect them to buy a bottle of Nardini Grappa just to perfectly recreate your recipe. So be simple. Use the commonest of ingredients and adjust your recipe to make them work.

Finally, the judges in a newspaper cookie contest are going to be foodies. We are a tribe that eats butter and foie gras and lots of wine. Your hippy coven might find the idea of cookies made out of birdseed and boiled linen a great way to connect with Mother Earth. We won't. So, if your recipe even hints at bran as an edible commodity, forget it. It doesn't stand a chance. Save it for the Whole Earth Christmas bakeoff. Likewise, cookies that substitute apple sauce for butter, cookies that use carob instead of chocolate, cookies that use grape juice instead of sugar. Forget about it. The closest to counting food that any of us will tolerate is perhaps Adkins, because foie gras and butter are allowed. We do tend to eat organic, but that is because organic produce outtastes the factory junk about seven to one. If we shop at hippy markets it is because they sell some great goat cheese that we cannot get elsewhere. Don't be fooled. Submit real cookies for real people.

However, anyone who bothered to send in a recipe wins points in my book, even if the recipe does basically mix KoolAid with merengue or call for wheat chaff or whatever those bits were that I had to floss out of my teeth. So, if you sent in a recipe, Bravo!

Anyway, it is now several hours after the tasting and I still would like to find a warm, sunny rock to lie down on to let the cookies digest. Since it is a late autumn night, a warm bed will have to suffice. Yodling will return later!

Portuguese Creole Yodling from Malacca

A few years back I was assigned a review of a gigantic box of CDs from Portugal's Tradisom label. The twelve discs, with fairly major booklets for each, each featured a different region from Portugal's once vast empire. The premise was to look for Portuguese influence in these various music cultures. Most of the discs were outstanding, some failed to do what they were supposed to do, but even then were interesting documents of little known music cultures.

You can read the full review here on the Rootsworld site.

Anyway, one of my favorite discs was number five: Kantiga Di Padri Sa Chang: Malaca, featuring some beautiful singing from Malacca. If you are like me, you had to look at a map of Southeast Asia to remember where exactly Malaca is. I found out that it was of vital importance in the days of seafaring. In fact, according to Tomé Pires back in 1512, "whoever is lord of Malacca has his hand on the throat of Venice." That was power indeed.

Anyway, for a period the Portuguese had control of this region, and their music left a lasting impression.

The song that really got me was the last track, called simply enough "O Amor." It starts as a wonderful tune that has a vaguely familiar style to it, although the language certainly throws off attempts at easy identification. But when the singer breaks into a full cowboy yodel, the whole thing suddenly comes into place. You see, the external influence on the music of the region did not stop with the Portuguese. Something in the American Country and Western tradition resonated with the people there, and they took the forms and styles and made them their own.

I know that Down Home Music in El Cerrito sells some of the individual discs from a viagem dos sons on the Tradisom label, and this disc is certainly worth it, for the good singing in general, but particularly for this great little cowboy yodel.

Something I might feel like writing on later is the connection between Portuguese music and Country music. Certainly the Portuguese had a lot to do with the sound of modern Hawaiian music, and we all know how that has influenced Country and Western (think of those weepy pedal steels). I also know that C and W is very popular among the Portuguese in California's Central Valley, and I think it has something to do with the fatalism, the brooding lyricism and the emphasis on string instruments.

Anyway, go check out this fantastic disc for one of the most unusual settings of cowboy yodeling. Next time I will talk about some Alpine Cowboy Yodling, sung in phonetic Englisch.

Avant Garde Jazz Yodling

So, from Tarzan to Hawaii we find yodling. There are various African styles of singing that involve alternation between chest and head voice, but I do not have any in my library (my collection is at its thinnest in Africa), so I can't give you any great examples right now.

However, there was an interesting jazz singer named Leon Thomas whose greatest claim to fame was being Pharoah Sanders' vocalist during Pharoah's mystical post-Coltrane period. Now, this was the 1960's, and these guys were in Oakland, so they probably made a lot of claims to this or that element of their music being directly from the heart of Africa. Those claims may fall anywhere from true to somewhat true, to completely pulled out of a hat while high on marijuana.

One way or another, African origin, or simply carrying out the Western (gasp!) tradition of extending musical technique and exploration of ideas, Leon Thomas turns in some fantastic yodling with Sanders. My favorite recording of theirs is Karma, which is full of all of the mystical baloney of the day, from the cover photo to the lyrics and liner notes:

"There was a time, when peace was on the earth,
and joy and happiness did reign. Each man
knew his worth. In my heart how I yearn for
that spirit's return and I cry, as the time flies,
Oooomm. Oooomm."

Also, this music is not for everyone. It is beautiful, unaplogetic post-Coltrane free jazz.

However, if you are willing to take a chance on this sort of thing, Karma is a fantastic record (even Melanie, who is not nearly as big a fan of free jazz as she ought to be, I mean, as I am, loves this record). It has two tracks, the first, "The Creator Has a Master Plan", clocks in at a whopping 32:45 and features some of the best structured music of that period.

Anyway, the reason I bring it up here is that Leon Thomas does some fantastic yodling on it, and it is something that must be heard to be understood.

Speaking of Pharoah Sanders, for those of you with more bop-oriented tastes, should definitely check out his Welcome to Love, which is all traditional ballads. Gorgeous stuff. But still, sometime in your life, arrange to have a good sit down listen with Karma. Great stuff.

Fowl alla Cacciatore

This is here by request. The person requesting it has my phone number and should feel free to call me with any questions.

This is a basic recipe that is suited for all domestic and game fowl, although I do not recommend it for domestic turkey (too much difference between the white and dark meat for it to cook right) or for the fattier birds (duck, goose, etc.).

1 bird (chicken, pheasant, partridge, grouse, etc.), dismembered
Extra virgin olive oil
3 or 4 oz pancetta, finely chopped
2 cloves of garlic, peeled and lightly crushed with the side of your knife
1 onion, cut into thin smiles
1 carrot, very finely diced
1 celery stock, very finely diced
2 ripe bell peppers (I find that any type will do, but avoid the unripe green ones), cored, seeded and cut into thin strips
1 box of Pomi chopped tomatoes from Italy (or a can of 6 in 1 tomatoes from Escalon)
1 cup of dry red wine (or dry white wine or extra dry vermouth)
1 pound crimini (brown) mushrooms, finely sliced
a large handful of dried porcini mushrooms, rehydrated with a cup of boiling water, allowed to sit for 20 minutes, then drained, straining and reserving the liquid, rinsed and finely chopped.
A dozen juniper berries, crushed (or a shot of gin - Beefeaters is the best brand for use in cooking, due to its higher juniper content)
1 Tablespoon fresh thyme leaves (or a teaspoon of dried, if necessary)
1 teaspoon fresh calamint leaves (if available, otherwise skip)
a pinch of fresh marjoram
a bay leaf (preferably Mediterranean bay, but California bay laurel is fine, if that is what you have)
fresh cracked pepper and sea salt to taste
finely chopped Italian parsley

In a large skillet heat up about two Tablespoons of olive oil and gently fry the pancetta. When the pancetta has been frying for about 90 seconds, add the garlic. When the pancetta is cooked, add the onion and fry for a couple of minutes. Add the celery, bell peppers, and carrot and fry until the onions are translucent. Remove vegetables to a work bowl.

If needed add more oil to the skillet and sautee the fresh and rehydrated mushrooms (with the calamint if you are using it). Remove to the work bowl when the mushrooms are cooked, along with any accumulated juices.

Heat up another two Tablespoons of oil and brown the bird parts. When they are done, return the vegetables to the skillet, along with the juniper berries (or gin), the reserved porcini mushroom juices, the tomatoes (and use the wine to get the last bits of tomato out of the container), the wine, and the herbs.

Simmer over low heat until the chicken is cooked, skimming fat and scum as it cooks. Salt and pepper to taste, finish with chopped parsley and serve over polenta or a simple risotto. For a wine, I recommend a young chianti classico, or the Nerello del Bastardo from Trader Joe’s.

If you have questions, email me at EKeilholtz[@t]aol[d.ot]com

Buon appetito!

Oh yes, one last thing before I go back to writing about why you should use a fulfillment company...

I have been requested to post an anti-Thanksgiving menu, which I will. The anti-Thanksgiving menu is a Catholic, harvest Thanksgiving menu that is intended as an alternative to celebrating the arrival and survival of the pestillence of Puritanism on these shores.

I will also post a quality Thanksgiving menu for those of you who want to use the traditional ingredients, but would prefer a feast that actually tastes like one (without inedibles like Devilled Eggs - please, send them back to the Hell that they smell like, and metallic canned and pitted olives (look, I can put them on my fingers! Whoopee! It is a much better use than actually trying to eat the little turdlets), and the like).

I will work on these menus in between procrastination breaks from the editing project. Fortunately Amalia is quite pleased constructing some sort of kingdom in her room that involves a castle and horses and her green tractor, or else I wouldn't be able to get anything done.

Menus will be posted this afternoon.

More on Espresso

Have I mentioned how much I love the CoffeeGeek site?

This article on espresso cups is just about my definition of perfect recreational reading. Why, he even measures the thickness of the cup walls and compares the three vendors of porcelain that Illy uses, and has a mini rant against espresso pods (yet still gives proper credit to Illy as a company that really understands espresso)! This is good fun.

Now, I must get back to editing the work that my client expects at the end of the day, so read and enjoy the aritcle.

How to earn half a star

Dear Restaurateur,

I am going to give you a test question in advance. If you want your rating to jump by half a star, go read this article on the God Shot.

What is a God Shot? From the linked article:

"But what exactly is the God Shot? The answer comes naturally to me, so naturally, that I can't actually put it in words with ease, but I do know instinctively what it is. One thing it's not: it is not meant to be a slam against God, or the breaking of one of the Ten Commandments (Thou shalt not...). It is a homage to God in a way because when someone talks about a God Shot, it is something so special, so unique, so perfect, it's almost as if God Himself has blessed it. And since a long ago Pope proclaimed that God blesses and approves of coffee, it is only natural it could extend to the perfect espresso: the God Shot."

The author goes on to define the range of the God Shot as "by nature ... the double ristretto."

The article even gives precise descriptions of it.

I am not saying that it is easy. More often than not I fail in the God Shot, and I brew about four ristretto doubles a day. The line between a God Shot (or any good ristretto) and a stalled shot (drip by bitter drip, a two minute monstrocity that you drink anyway because, well the cost of coffee beans, you know...) can be fine. Too much pressure with the tamper, a couple of microns too fine a grind and STALL. But if you get it right, you serve the concentrated pure essence of coffee. Perfection. A taste of Heaven on Earth.

So, dear Restaurateur, if you are going to have your waitrons brewing the espresso, train them, make them read this article, make them brew espresso until they can make a proper ristretto in their sleep.

The restaurant I reviewed last week in Alameda (a neat little place called C'era Una Volta - if you are in the area, check it out. The review will run Friday in the Preview Section) served an excellent espresso, which earned them half a star on the overall meal, probably the half star deducted from the otherwise perfect Dopo in Oakland (actually I think we were using a different system when I reviewed Dopo, so the currency is not exactly the same, but it is the only reason that Dopo did not get a perfect rating, which was too bad, because that is a great little restaurant).

If you are reading this for home consumption, the first thing to do is to buy a burr grinder. Then, throw out the overroasted French Roasts (and Peet's Major Dickason's Roast as well -- too dark). Then practice on your machine. You can make good espresso with wretched machines, even the steam powered ones, BUT you must practice. With the worst of the machines you will need to practice so long that by the time you reliably get it the machine will be worn out.

For those of you who are wondering: I have a cheap Krups pump machine, the very cheapest pump-driven machine you can find. It took me a week (and replacing the portafilter with one salvaged off my old steam driven machine), but I can get realiably good espresso provided I use decent beans.

I even get a God Shot here and there!

Yodeling

We are going to spend some time on Erik's Rants and Recipes talking about yodeling. Then, if I am in the mood, we will talk about bagpipes.

The main reason I want to spill pixels over these topics is that there are too many people who think that yodeling is divided into 2 categories: Alpine and Cowboy. Similarly there are people who think that the bagpipes are a uniquely British Isles sort of thing.

We are going to look at the world of yodeling, beyond the Alps and the American range.

However, we will not neglect these great traditions of yodeling.

Are you curious? Are you so curious that you must learn how to yodel?

Good. Go here for the online yodel course. If you finish (honor system), you can email him and get a certificate. It is a fun course and will get you up to some proficiency in the art.

Now. The reason that I wanted to post on this is that I have been listening to the immensely talented Raiatea Mokihana Maile Helm. We first heard her at a Hawaiian music festival last year, and were completely entranced by her voice. Honestly, if you want to know what the angels in Heaven sing in between motets by Orlando di Lasso, this is it. My parents were in Hawaii a few weeks ago and I asked them to look for a CD of hers if they happened to be around places that sold Hawaiian music. To my good fortune, they found a CD of hers, and if it were a vinyl record I would have probably worn it out by now.

Raiatea Helm is probably the best yodeler I have heard in a long time. She moves between head and chest voice with a lyricism that can't be beat. Polynesian languages are ideal for yodeling, as they are rather vowel heavy, and require that each letter be pronounced (I remember reading that I was going to be landing at the Faaa airport in Tahiti. I assumed that it stood for something: Federacion Aerospatiale, etc. No. They build the airport in Fa-a-a. Cool).

So, for tonight's yodeling recommendation, let me steer you to this young and talented Hawaiian singer.

Meanwhile, let me ask you a trivia question: Who is the most famous yodeler in the world? Think about it and then look in the Extended Entry section for the answer.

A hint: he was also a champion Olympic swimmer, but he is better known for his yodel than for his swimming.

Another hint: he was basically an Alpenjodler, although he did it in his own style.

If you thought of the yodel heard round the world and it was this one, pat yourself on the back. Yes, the famous Tarzan cry is a glorious, full-blown Alpenjodl (or Alpenjodel, but I believe that the Alpine folks spell it without the "e"). Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah!

Stupid Distractions!

I have a project that I have been wanting to start, but I never seem to find it in me to actually start it. Other projects have been started, and finished, but this one just seems to pop into my mind and stay there. I have resisted using ideas from it in other projects, because I was "saving them" for this big, grand project.

Well, I was in my studio this evening, working on some caligraphy and listening to the rain and it dawned on me: this idea I have is a bad one. It is bloated, moves in too many directions, would be costly, time-consuming, and has little chance of actually working. So I cannibalized it and will see what can be used in other things.

It is a good feeling to reject an idea before investing too much in it.

However, I am wary of feeling too triumphant. Other bad ideas were put to rest only to pop up when, in a moment of weakness, I thought "Ah-hah! Before it was wrong, but here I have the solution. Now I will make this thing!"

The danger of these bad projects is that they are never done and they require so much work that I get really reluctant to scrap them once they are started, even after hours and hours and hours of reworking. I have this one canvas, for instance, that is probably beyond saving, but when I look at it I see a good idea here and a good idea there and think of the hours I have put into it, and I balk at doing the sensible thing of burning it and starting something new.

Part of what stops me is the memory of one really bad painting that finally got so wretched that I completely reworked it, so that only a couple of square inches of the original paint are visible. That painting ended up being one of my favorite ones. I finished the reworking about eight years ago, and I still like to look at the painting.

So, with these faulty projects I just plug away, secretly hoping that I will eventually wreck the thing and HAVE to radically rework it.

But it still feels good to nip a grandiose monstrocity in the bud!

Farmers' Market Report

We are definitely in a transition time right now. A few farmers were unloading their anemic looking tomatoes (time to go canned, folks), there are still some decent looking bell peppers, and we did buy some bartlett pears (probably the last we will buy this year, depending on the weather between now and Saturday), but mostly the good stuff is found in Fuji and Pink Lady apples, fuyu persimmons, chard, beets, and the like.

I am starting to see some really good Brussels sprouts, so I will probably be using those soon.

Meanwhile, don't forget the noble pumpkin. Last week we were carving them and found that one of them had walls that were about four inches thick. To better enhance the lighting, we thinned it and had a ton of pumpkin flesh leftover. I roasted it in chunks with some olive oil and served it as a side dish (very yummy) and saved a bunch of it for a risotto (also yummy - a basic risotto with carrots, celery, onion, dried porcini mushrooms, pancetta, garlic, mixed meat stock, butter, olive oil, then, when the risotto is almost ready, add the roasted pumpkin. Finish with butter, pecorino romano, and top with crumbled Amaretti and chopped parsley. Serve with a dry young red, like a Montepulciano d'Abruzzo).

At today's market I saw some other fall squashes that looked pretty good, too.

For salads, radicchio and red lettuce look the best, and go quite well with pomegranite seeds (also in season), persimmon, shaved pecorino romano, and a balsamic vinaigrette.

Also, there are still some good local table grapes. We bought a giant bunch of red seedless grapes, most of which will go into a foccaccia.

It's Over, Grandma

The title of this post is the last line of The Triplets of Belleville, which has become a favorite in our household. Of course, in this context, I mean the election and my commenting on it (at least for now).

So, since bullfighting season is over, it will be back to recipes, art, and music.

John Salmon left an interesting suggestion for my fantasy art show: propaganda art. I have a soft spot for good propaganda art (particularly posters), and could see this as a great show. My favorites of vintage agitprop come from the early days of the Russian Revolution, before Lenin turned against modern art. Most Social Realism leaves me cold, but those early Roosky Commies had style. If only they applied it to marketing vermouth or something.

Of course I cannot praise Commie agitprop without giving a nod to the Italian Futurists and their relationship with Il Duce. My favorite bust of Mussolini comes from the Futurists, and I also remember a great series of plates that commemorated the Fascist Revolution.

Of course my favorite period of Modern European History (in terms of reading about it - it really would have been better if it did not have to happen at all) is the Spanish Civil War. For propaganda art, the Commies probably won, but they were not all that solid (no, I don't count Picasso, because he didn't do that much of it, and La Guernica only works as propaganda if you know the title. If it had been called Dresden, the painting could still be read exactly the same. And come to think of it, La Guernica works as a painting by shortchanging its propagandistic intent (see also Brecht, Bertolt)). The Nationalists really did not have a good body of propadanda art, although the arrows with yoke is a marvelous logo.

In America we have had some good propaganda art, particularly in the Labor movement. Some of the sixties stuff wasn't bad, but they were already going down the road of unfairly subjecting the art to the message.

Unfortunately what we have for mainstream art nowadays is all propoganda with very little art. It does sadden me that the folks who gave us the "Internationale" have degenerated into Judy Chicago.

Of course I have to agree with Robert Hughes on the complete uselessness of message painting. I don't think anyone has ever been converted to any political system by a painting. Sure the party faithful will find a resonance, but I don't think that there is a work of art in the world that can make a rational person decide that their understanding of the body politic needs adjustment.

And I am glad that that is the case. I would fear anyone of any political persuassion who used a painting as a political argument.

But, as I have said before, content in art is secondary to composition (under which heading I have to place color - sorry to all of you who are still fighting the war between the classicists and the colorists) and personal introspection (the much harder thing to quantify in art criticism).

Good propaganda art, then, allows good composition by providing a framework for the artist to work around, just as the sonata allegro form does not make the music but gives a structure for the composer. However, man is a political animal, so it would be daft to demand an apolitical art. Art and politics will always intersect, or at least nod to one another as they pass in the night. The best we can hope for is that the politics informs the art without crushing it outright.

Anyway, this notion of a fantasy art show is a good one, so think one up. Here is one for you to ponder:

Representations of coffee in art. Coffee cups, with or without fur. Cafes. Plein air paintings of coffee plantations. Commercial art on coffee labels. The design of espresso machines. Intricately worked ibriks from Turkey.

OK. Time to Leave

I am not a love it or leave it sort of person, but there were a lot of folks who claimed that they were going to move to Canada if Bush won. Well? Bye. Don't slam the door on your way out!

I am celebrating, but not the election of Bush. Rather I am rejoicing that Kerryman lost. He was a creep and the world is much better off that he will not be the President of the United States.

Why am I not celebrating Bush?

Because I am skeptical. He now has a mandate, his supporters clearly voted for him on moral issues, he has a Republican Congress, homosex marriage was barred in 11 states. There can be no more excuses. Herr Bush, du bist jetzt dran. Ball's in your court.

To my fellow conservative Catholics who supported Bush, let this be the litmus test. If Bush fails, then we have a moral duty to treat the party of Gubernator von Kennedy with the same disgust and disdain that we treat the party of Barbara Lee.

I wish Herr Bush the best, but I am not expecting much. We need to be harder on him than ever. There is no room for excuses. Beware of pseudo-conservatives.

The Joy of Classic Cooking

I am writing a review of a restaurant that is really fun. The reason? I have had to consult Escoffier three times to check terminology. That is the sort of review that I like to write, especially when the food is as good as this place (the Montclair Bistro in Oakland). For more information, please be sure to get a copy of the Oakland Tribune, Tri-Valley Herald, The Argus, The San Mateo County Times, or The Alameda Times Star on Friday. Or better yet, why not subscribe? It would make circulation very happy. And when circulation is happy, we are happy. Besides, these are good local papers that cover local events much better than that Hearst job on Mission St.

Erik's Rants and Recipes 2004 General Election Endorsements

I finally waded through everything last night, so here are my eleventh hour endorsements. Print this out and take it to the booth with you.

President and Vice President: George W. Bush and Richard Cheney. Note that this is a fairly lukewarm endorsement. Do not think that a vote for Bush is a vote for the Culture of Life. Rather it is a vote against an even bigger player in the Culture of Death. When it comes down to it, all of the third parties are deficient. The Greens, Peace and Freedom, Libertarians and Democrats are obviously out. The American Independent/Constitution Party is profoundly Protestant in its foundation and will do more to harm the common good than the Republicans.

United States Senator: Bill Jones. I do not like the man, but he is not Barbara Boxer.

Ninth Congressional District: Claudia Bermudez. She seems pretty good, but most importantly, she is not Barbara Lee. Come to think of it, I might be calling for a ban on the name Barbara pretty soon, given Boxer, Lee and Streisand.

State Senator, Ninth District: Patricia Deutsche. Fairly wanky, but not nearly as bad as Don Perata.

Member of the State Assembly, Sixteenth Assembly District: Jerald Udinsky.

AC Transit District Director, At Large: H. E. Christian Peeples. This current director is firmly committed to public transit and has a decent record.

AC Transit Disctrict Director, Ward 2: Greg Harper. Doing a good job, and his opponent is the head of the Transit Union, which is akin to asking the fox to guard the henhouse.

East Bay Municipal Utility District Director, Ward 6: no recommendation

Proposition 1A: NO. Watch for hidden items in this bipartisan bill.

Proposition 59: NO. Open meetings sound fine and dandy, but these sorts of propositions are like snakes that come around and bite you when you have them by the tale.

Proposition 60: NO.

Proposition 61: NO. An expensive omnibus of special interests, putting childrens' hospitals on the top in order to twang the heart strings. We have a serious financial crisis in the state, and this will not help.

Proposition 62: NO. This will only encourage more centrism.

Proposition 63: NO. This bill will further erode California's tax base, leaving us holding the bag for programs we can no longer afford.

Proposition 64: YES. Renegade lawyers are destroying small businesses. Put a stop to the John Edwardses of California.

Proposition 65: NO.

Proposition 66: NO. California's Three Strikes law needs fine tuning. This measure proposes surgical changes with a chain saw. Contrary to the Prop 66 propoganda, there is already a lot of discression allowed judges and prosecutors at every level of sentencing as to whether or not to prosecute a third strike. Talking about "bad check writers" being in prison overlooks the other felonies that got them there. We are not talking about the person who once in awhile bounces a check, but a felon who is frauduently undermining our fiscal system on a fairly massive scale. Anyway, most of the people who will be potentially freed by this are not bad check writers, but arsonists, attempted child rapists who were caught before they actually did the deed, and assorted bad lots who need to be locked up.

Proposition 67: NO. Another tax to support a vague list of health-related boondogles. Our health care system needs real fixing, not bandaids like this.

Proposition 68: NO. I don't like the fact that Ahnuld von Kennedy is gubernator, but he has been playing hardball with the Indians, and this could seriously undermine his work in this area.

Proposition 69: YES. A DNA database will help prove the innocence of unfairly incarcerated people. It will help track down serious criminals. It only collects this information from felons, not the general population. Libertarian privacy issues are nothing more than paranoid ravings from the usual suspects.

Proposition 70: NO. 99 Year compacts?!? Forget about it.

Propostion 71: NO. Why can't the public see that the "Nobel Laureates" who support this are basically another special interest looking to line their pockets with $6 billion of public funds at the expense of the most vulnerable members of our society? These Mengeles are taking advantage of liberal pro-abortion pro-endarkenment sentiment to push this wholly evil proposition.

Proposition 72: NO. Another ill-though-out measure that will destroy out economy.

Bay Area Rapid Transit District Measure AA: YES. Arguing that we have not had an earthquake in 30 years is about as dumb as building a village between Mt. Vesuvius and Pompei. We need the seismic upgrades, and soon.

City of Oakland Measure Y: NO. A ludicrously high property tax assessment that will go mostly to a whole host of social workers and their ilk in a bunch of misguided "violence prevention" programs.

City of Oakland Measure Z: NO. Let Soviet Monica do the lobbying for legal marijuana. Oakland has better things to spend its money on.

AC Transit Special District 1 Measure BB: YES. We have a pretty good bus system in the East Bay, and we rely on it heavily, even if we don't use it (think of all the cars that could clog up I-580 at rush hour). This is a very modest parcel tax ($2 per month) to support and improve a good system.

East Bay Regional Park District Zone 1 Measure CC: YES. The Regional Parks are part of what make the East Bay a livable region. I can drive five minutes and be in a redwood forest, looking at fish in the stream where the rainbow trout was first identified as a species. However, the parks need some infrastructural improvement that will benefit all of us. The list of projects that will be funded by this measure are worthy ones, and will make the park experience even better. The modest parcel tax ($1 a month) will come back to property owners, because these parks make our cities much better places to live.