Barack Obama and JFK

Remember, if he gets the nomination, you have to call him Barack Osama at every single opportunity. Yes, it seems like an ignorant rednecky sort of thing to do, but it will be important. Trust us. His followers will then say, "but he is a Christian", thus allowing you to ask about just what sort of Christian he is.

Anyway, Democrats are living in the past, and who can blame them?

Ah, to bask in the good old days of...Carter?

Poor, poor bastards. Obviously, you might be thinking, "this is about as close to partisan support Keilholtz has ever expressed? Is he going Republican?" No, of course not. The Republicans are the enemy. Ever since they fought against Franco and the Nationalists...

Oh, not those Republicans. The other ones. The Freemasons and Prottie Party. Ah, yes. Forget it. Cut from the same loaf as the Democrats.

Anyway, where was I?

Ah, yes. This Osama fellow being a lot like Kennedy. I think so. They are both shallow men who rely on their long gazes into an optimistic future to pass as deep thought. They both, remarkably, since that Osama fellow doesn't look Irish, have ears that stick out considerably (perhaps there is some Irish DNA floating around Kenya - as if they didn't have enough problems already. Let me tell you about this Massai who was walking home from the pub the other night...Hold it! I have just had an epiphany. It's Barack O'Bama, son of Paddy O'Bama, and grandson of Kevin Seamus O'Bama. Holy Giraffe, Batman! Barack is really a Kennedy! Good Lord, get ready for some serious nation building wars if this turkey gets elected. What does Turkey have to do with it? Are you saying we should invade Turkey?), and they both have connections to some silly little post-Protestant school in Massachussetts.

I still say that Osama would be better than Hillary and Romney, but at that point all hope is lost in the American political system.