Ash Wednesday

At the end of last night's Mardi Gras party, the topic of an Ash Wednesday greeting came up.

You don't say, "Happy Ash Wednesday!" so we figured that we should come up with a better one: Sad Ash Wednesday! Bitter Ash Wednesday!

And then, this morning, I got one:

May your suffering increase and may it bring you closer to Christ!

OK, it sounds like some sort of Jansenist thing, though. Some people are probably maxed out on suffering. You couldn't walk into a pediatric cancer ward and grab the hand of the first parent you see and say that.

And, if you say it to a bon-vivant it comes accross as the sort of self-righteousness we are told to avoid (or even worse, as a sort of Marxist sentiment): "Oh, Scrooge, may you finally get a taste of what you are dishing out!"

So that will not do.

"Have a Profitable Ash Wednesday!" sounds so Prottie I think I would be sorely tempted to give the speaker a little bit of Penancing right there on the spot.

"Hey, Dirt!" Now there is something! It is kind of casual, so it doesn't sound like you are condemning the person to eternal hellfire (and smugly gloating that you are not going there yourself). It is severe and himiliating, but so rooted in the liturgy, that it makes instant sense, and comes accross as very familiar and friendly. Hey Dirt! Sort of like dirtbag, but without the malice.

And it is much better than saying, "excuse me, but I think you have something stuck on your forehead."