Back ache! Bah humbug! At best they are simple goldbricking, at worst a psychosomatic ailment!!!

I was not picking anything heavy up. In fact, I wasn't picking anything up at all. I was placing a thin, lightweight piece of cedar on a saw horse and every muscle fibre in my back seemed to cramp at once.

I don't go for this sort of nonsense. Back pain. Hogwash!

It's nothing a long walk in the hills won't cure. Ever since psychologists have decided that their job is to ratify feelings rather than get people over their neuroses and psychoses, that option is out.

The first person, by the way, to suggest that I see a chiropractor, gets moved immediately to the top of the priority list for the Reeducation Centers in the Keilholtz Dictatorship.

The interesting thing about it all is that it does not seem to respond one bit to ibuprofen, which makes me believe all the more that back pain is nothing but a psychological or moral defect, along the lines of most colds. These are diseases that are best treated with punishment rather than coddling.

Anyway, troops, quit your whining, and MARCH!